Few Rules from men to other men
==> Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his fellow party-goers.
==> Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
==> It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
– The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse
– After wrecking your boss Ferrari
– When your date is using her teeth
==> Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
==> If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.
==> The minimum amount of time you have to wait for a guy who’s running late is 5 minutes. Maximum waiting time is 6 minutes
==> Talking about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. Gripe at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
==> No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (In fact, even remembering your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional.)
==> When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.
==> Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
==> If a man’s zipper is down, that’s his problem — you didn’t see nothing’.
==> Women who claim the “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a buffalo wing clean.
==> If you complement a guy on his six-pack, you’d better be talking about his choice of beer.
==> Phrases that may not be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
– Yeah, Baby, Push it!
– C’mon, give me one more! Harder!
– Another set and we can hit the showers!
– Nice A*s, are you a Sagittarius?
==> Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
==> When a buddy is trying to hook up, you may sabotage him only in a manner that gives you no chance of hooking up either.
If you’re a guy: You will laugh a little and realize how true this is!
If you’re a woman: Laugh and roll your eyes at our stupidity!