If you think you’re dumb when it comes to computers, read this.
From a Novell NetWare SysOp
CALLER: “Hello, is this Tech Support?”
TECH: “Yes, it is. How may I help you?”
CALLER: “The cup holder on my PC is broken – and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?”
TECH: “I’m sorry, but did you say a cup holder?”
CALLER: “Yes, it’s attached to the front of my computer.”
TECH: “Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it’s because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?”
CALLER: “It came with my computer. I don’t know anything about a promotional. It just has ‘4X’ on it.”
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn’t stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and it had snapped it off the drive.
A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asked her if she was “running it under windows.”
The woman responded, “No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working fine.”
And last but not least
TECH SUPPORT: “O.K. Bob, let’s press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter “P” to bring up the Program Manager.”
CUSTOMER: “I don’t have a ‘P’”.
TECH SUPPORT: “On your keyboard, Bob.”
CUSTOMER: “What do you mean?”
TECH SUPPORT: “‘P’ on your keyboard, Bob.”
CUSTOMER: “I’m not going to do that!”